Living the Bukowski lifestyle has its drawbacks.
Celebrate too much last night? Whether you scored a big promotion or happen to be one of "The Hurt Locker" producers who made a bleary-eyed appearance on the "Today Show" following Oscar night reverie, having entirely too much to drink is a time-honored way of celebrating a great personal success. The other side of the coin: It's also an ill-conceived balm for stinging failures, like getting passed over for that big promotion or starring in "Battlefield Earth." Another tradition that goes hand-in-hand with too much of a good thing is the oddball hangover remedy that sounds suspiciously like an outtake from the TV show "Most Extreme Elimination Challenge."
Hair of the Dog
Consider the "Hair of the Dog," as in, "the hair of the dog that bit you." This hangover cure is a masterpiece of simplicity: Drink more alcohol to ease your pain. This can sometimes be misinterpreted as "Avoid hangovers: Stay drunk," which is not what you are supposed to do at all. If you are going to self-medicate with hair of the dog, then the best way is to keep drinking in moderation. Hopefully you will read the above sentences and decide that this is not the smartest way to go about a hangover cure. At best, you will feel better for a short period of time before you begin to feel much, much worse. Seriously, don't do this because you will likely end up very sick and spending the night at your local ER. Most hospitals are not as funny as the one in "Scrubs," so it's really not worth it.
Prairie Oyster (Jeeves and Wooster style)
Fans of P.G. Wodehouse's Jeeves and Wooster stories will tell you that the hangover cure prepared by Jeeves for his hapless master Wooster is a subtle variation of the classic Prairie Oyster recipe. An American style Prairie Oyster is a none-too-appealing mix of vinegar, pepper, Worcestershire sauce, tomato juice and one raw egg. The modified Prairie Oyster that Jeeves prepares is an equally blech-worthy concoction of clam juice, pepper, brandy, Worcestershire sauce and, of course, one raw egg. You might know someone who swears by the Jeeves recipe as a reliable hangover tonic; do not listen to them.
Soot and Warm Milk
If you want to get downright Dickensian with your hangover cures, you can always ingest the tonic preferred by 19th century chimney sweeps, soot and warm milk. That's right, a few dashes of ashy black soot from your chimney or furnace into a glass of perfectly good warm milk. File this one under "weird things our ancestors did" and walk away. If you find yourself so desperate to alleviate your hangover that you consider taking a soot and warm milk "cure," eat a bacon sandwich instead; studies show that bacon actually can help soothe the hangover blues.
Tags: Prairie Oyster, hangover cure, warm milk, Jeeves Wooster, Worcestershire sauce, your hangover